I grew weary of being weary long ago. Like many of you , mine was not an easy upbringing. With an abusive brother and a loss of confidence from that abuse, it was open season on me for years from anyone who had a chip on their shoulder. Two things happened that changed all this, one was judo and the other the Bible. Judo taught me to defend myself and that seemed to change my demeanor so that my outer “persona” closed off from such abuse. I was pretty much just one of the group from then on. I only realized this many years later.
The other is the Bible and, though it didn’t make me any type of icon or religious zealot, it did keep me from doing a lot of things that might have taken me down or, if I was stepping on my own conscience, kept me from continuing to do so. One and done, so to speak. The other, and probably the most important, is that it taught me of my imperfection and that opened me to prayer and forgiveness. God forgives even the worst of us if we turn it around and I was not far from the worst in a lot of cases. Especially after Vietnam when drinking got the better of me.
It has been a long road and I come here only to write about what I consider to be things we all have to face down to get over. Doesn’t much matter what I am or have done but what I can do to speak of the negative but reply with the positive. I don’t know if I’m very good at this but I am giving it a shot.
In general, I am old and somewhat tired of all this world has to offer as it is all transitory and, for the most part, meaningless when it comes down to it. If you can afford expensive baubles, mansions and Ferrari’s, then you can also afford to help out those less fortunate. If you are poor and struggling God knows this and reserves the world for you in the next phase so hold your head up and pray for what God intends to help you with. Each to his measure. If you are more fortunate, thank God for what you have and help those less fortunate. Above all, learn of God and Jesus and then you can achieve equilibrium of spirit. If you can do this, you will open yourself to God’s presence and that is a wonder to participate in.
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